Hypothetically...

Sometimes dealing with someones negativity your entire life can get real heavy. Like a cannonball in a backpack heavy. You're privy to this negative way of life and you begin to realize this is just how it is so you just let it happen. You become a negativity enabler. You almost encourage this horrible behavior because if they're talking to you about how awful the world is then that means they aren't talking about how awful you are.

And then in typing this you wonder if this is where you got some of your more deviant social behavior from... (that's gotta be a whole other blog)

Anyway... once this negativity has seeped it's way into your conscience you're inseparable from it, kinda. I mean who wants to be an enabler. Soo what do we do... ensure ourselves of how happy and positive we are to distance ourselves from said energy intruder. That feels like a lie, then how happy you truly are starts to feel like a lie and your positive out look gets muddled and if you're a defeatist (like I tend to me) they win with all their lies and intentional digs and persecution. Then you start to wonder if this negative being ever really liked you to begin with. If they only kept you around to have someone to

A: complain about when you're not around and

B: to turn you into a nasty mean liar like them.

Then your whole relationship with Person Of The Year comes up to jury. If they didn't like you to begin with that probably explains all those horrible remarks about your husband and their initial disdain from him... And the sideways jabs at your kids... Your house... Your life... Your pets. CRAP!

I should of just continued to enable.

Now I wanna be sad. I wanna question everything. If I had been better. Would they like me more? No this goes beyond not liking this is some arch nemesis shit. But I'm not sad... I'm not questioning... everything (just some things). Cuz if I'm all 'BooHoo look at how sad I am' they win right?

WINNING

They win by creating even more negativity in the world. It hurts, this epiphany has taken it's toll but I'm still groovy. I still love everything through my own dark veil and I'm not tainted by lifes pretty little liars... Yet.